In the Meantime...

While I wait for employment, I sell dolls.

These aren't particularly special dolls. They are just a typical name brand doll that seems to be impossible to find for some people and every now and then I get lucky enough to get my hands on one...or two. Whenever this happens, I list them on Amazon and sell the little turds.

As a child, I hated dolls. Especially Barbie. I lived in fear that my headless Barbie would come to life while I slept and try to take my head off. To this day, I have a hard time even walking down the Barbie aisle.

Then, about four or five years ago, I stumbled across these Japanese dolls that I simply couldn't do without. They were, and are, a little on the creepy side. They have these giant eyes that you can make move and blink by pushing little buttons and switches on the back of the heads. To make matters worse (or better in my opinion), they are all dressed like witches, pirates and vampires. Some have red eyes, some have fangs and some of them wear little black cloaks. They are lined up on the top shelf of the book case in the guest room of my house. I haven't had a friend or family member yet who hasn't complained about how unnerving it is to try to sleep with my dolls surrounding them. Whatever...now they know how I felt about Barbie.

Anyhow, what started off as a harmless collection has sort of spread into an addiction. Thankfully, those Japanese dolls cost way more than I can afford to pay on a regular basis, which means that I can only buy about one a year. Sometimes a family member pities me and buys me a doll for Christmas or my birthday. This wasn't enough, though. I needed to feed the beast.

So, one day, I was wondering through my local Target when I stumbled upon another doll brand that had just come out. It was based off of a little web cartoon series about the children of old movie monsters. (I'm sure you know the dolls I'm talking about.) Long story short, they were way less expensive then my other dolls so I bought up one of each doll.

Then I lost my job. :(

While I like those little cheap dolls, I really couldn't afford to keep buying them and I really didn't have the space in my guest room to display them. As a fluke, I listed a few of the originals on Amazon for way more than I ever payed for them and they sold... immediately. Then I listed all of them. The rest, is history.

It seems odd to me now. I didn't ever really think I would own anything in my life that someone else would be willing to pay four or five times the list price for. I also never thought that I would be making my car payments with them. Thankfully, I am. It's turned out to be the weirdest business venture for me, the girl who hated Barbies.

In the Beginning...

I would like to start this blog by saying that I'm a gainfully employed, college graduate. I'd like to say that I've spent the past six years finishing college, paying off my student loans and fighting off graduate program acceptance letters off with a stick. I would also like to say that I'm 24 years old, in the prime of my life and without a single ounce of credit card debit.

I'd really like to start that way. Clearly, that's not the case.

Without getting into a lot of detail, I'm a 36 year old art student in my senior year of college. So here we go...a few simple questions that will have to be answered before our adventure begins.

Question: What have you been doing with your life, old lady?
Answer: Several things. Without boring you to much,  I've been living my, "the road less traveled," life. I got out of high school, worked a series of horrible jobs, got married, moved away from the life I knew in Texas to the one I now know in Arizona, decided I wanted to be an artist, went to a college that ripped me off, got a divorce, transferred from said rip off college to ACTUAL university, and got remarried.

Question: How can it possibly take someone SIX years to finish a bachelors degree?
Answer: It's actually very simple! Thanks for asking. Go to a small, private college that says they are accredited for three years, then try to transfer to a university and discover that exactly one third of your classes actually count towards any degree in the real world. Now you get to be $50,000 in debt and have the joy of taking all your classes over again. Hurray!

Question: Didn't it occur to you that your art degree would leave you unemployed?
Answer: Yes and no. No one really goes to art school thinking that their work is shit. I mean, I went to art school knowing I was no Picasso but hoping I was at least better than Mary Engelbreit. Now I see how much money Mary's rolling in and I know that she's laughing her cutesy little ass all the way to the bank. Regardless, I thought I was talented. I have since discovered I'm really not all that talented. There's no way to get paid as an artist unless you are extremely talented, believe you're extremely talented or extremely batshit crazy. I'm none of those things. I think it goes without saying that I'm now an Art History major.

Question: How does your family handle all this?
Answer: Well, to put it simply, they ignore a lot of my failures because they love me. It's sappy, I know. The truth is that I haven't exactly been sitting on my ass my whole life. They know that I mean well and that I honestly try. At least, I hope they know that. They've yelled at me, they've had many, "come to Jesus," conversations with me, and they've told me they are proud of me. I'm like any other person in the world, I want to make my family proud. Obviously, I'm still a work in progress. Also, I'm a grown ass woman now and while my goal is to make the them proud, it's my life and I'm the one that's gotta live it.

Question: So, why the blog?
Answer: I can't be alone. In fact, I know I'm not. I know lots of people my age just finishing college with tons of debit and no job. Now it could just be that I know a lot of losers. It's not out of the realm of possibilty here. Still, I'm a fairly good judge of character (not including the first husband) and I have to believe that these are lots of, "the road less traveled," people. I feel as though we just wanted to experience life in a different order. Do I wish I'd done it in the order every normal person on Earth adheres to? You bet your ass I do! I didn't, though. I don't think I'm loser. I certainly don't think any of the people I know or who might find something in common with this situation are losers. As I'm often saying, it simply is what it is. No where near perfect but I haven't anything in life that is.

In conclusion, I guess I'm starting a blog so that I, as well as others, can keep my sanity through this unemployment crisis in my life. While I'd like a high paying gallery job, I'm not getting that job. I'm getting a minimum wage job that I'm entirely too old to be working. So I hope you find comfort, sanity or joy in this blog. ;)